Awkward Moment When You Glue A Screw Driver Into Your Shoe

That awkward moment when you are fixing your sandals and you accidentally Krazy Glue a screwdriver into your shoe and can't get it out. Yeah, that was me... 

That awkward moment when you accidentally Krazy Glue a screwdriver into your shoe

I was eventually able to pull it out, but took a small piece of the sandal with it...

...and there is a piece of the shoe left on your screwdriver

Ordering Pizza to Avoid Cooking in the Heat

Sheer genius: ordering pizza to avoid the heat of cooking... then realizing you have to walk down the street in the ninety something heat and humidity to pick it up.

Plants Gone Wild - Part 3

As I continue the saga of trying to reclaim my yard and gardens from "Plants Gone Wild", wonderful things continue to come to light:

1) when ivy vines are embedded UNDER vinca, they can really do a number on your back trying to pull them out. It's kind of like fishing when you catch a really big one! 
2) I discovered the planter in the picture below which I built when we first moved here, but I haven't seen it since around 1997. 
3) I was wondering where those extension cords went to. Haven't seen them since putting up Christmas lights a few years ago!

I discovered the planter in the picture which I built when we first moved here, but I haven't seen it since around 1997.

This is what the planter looked like before, only it was worse.  I had already pulled out a bunch of invasive balloon flowers.

Back to Plants Gone Wild - Part 2

Continue to Plants Gone Wild - Part 4

When Giants Run You Down

So you know that scene in Jurrasic Park where the Tyrannosaurus is chasing the jeep... we'll I had a similar feeling on my run this evening. I hear this... THUMP... THUMP... THUMP... THUMP... over the patter of my footsteps... pat... pat... pat... pat... I waited, not wanting to turn around. Then this giant of a guy came striding by me who had to be almost 7ft. He literally took one step for every 3 or 4 of mine! Wow. If there had been rain puddles on the ground I would have been looking for ripples...

Plants Gone Wild - Part 2

Today's episode of "Plants Gone Wild" I learned a few more new things: 

1) I learned that my sidewalk is really 5ft wide instead of 3. 
2) vinca, ivy, and creeping junipers are a HUGE pain in the a** when growing together let alone by themselves. 
3) landscape lights really don't work that well after you cut the wire with pruning shears...

Plants gone wild - My sidewalk was really 5 ft wide, not 3!  The ivy just above the planter along with the creeping juniper that it covered and intertwined with was extended out into the sidewalk where the dirt marks are.  Wow.

Back to Plants Gone Wild - Part 1

Continue to Plants Gone Wild - Part 3

Kicking Ice Cubes Under Your Refrigerator

That lazy moment when you drop an ice cube on the kitchen floor when you are getting it out of the tray...   then you just kick the pieces under the refrigerator.  Of course when it is a whole cube, I'll pick it up.  ...because  ...it won't fit under the refrigerator!

Ice Cream Trucks and Playgrounds - They Don't Take Long to Empty

Nothing can clear a playground faster than the sound of an approaching ice cream truck. Basketball players and all. Lmao! One of these days I'm going to catch it on video... too frickin' hilarious!  Ice cream can be such a powerful thing...

Nothing can clear a playground faster than the sound of an approaching ice cream truck.

When Strangers Stick Their Tongues Out

If you are ever on a walk and a guy rides by you on a bike, looks you in the eye, and sticks his tongue out and wiggles it around... walk faster... or run!

Cookie Stealing Cat Gets Caught in the Act

A day in the life with those damn cats: Last time it was my back pack, this time I awake to find my cat's a** sticking out of my kitchen cabinet as he was opening a brand new bag of cookies.... only he didn't get a chance to run this time! Muah ha ha ha...

Plants Gone Wild - Part 1

In over five years of neglecting my garden, I have declared it "Plants Gone Wild" as the plants have seemed to have a mind of their own and have taken over everything.  I have taken on this project of taming my "Plants Gone Wild".

Things that I learned from this session of Plants Gone Wild:
1)  I rediscovered that my driveway is really about 60ft instead of 30ft and can hold 4 cars instead of 2
2)  Forsythia's are a pain in the a** when the try to spread out everywhere
3)  There is a plant that is even more of a pain in the a** that even overtakes the forsythia and I don't even know the name of it
4)  Totally vacuuming your leaves up from every tiny corner that they gather in every year is much better that dealing with it when you don't
5)  I found my garden hose again
6)  My basement windows were dark for a reason

Plants Gone Wild: BEFORE There is actually a driveway under there and a house for that matter.

Plants Gone Wild: AFTER - Hey! There's my garden hose.  I haven't seen that in a while.  And there are the basement windows! And you can actually see the driveway.  Good stuff!

Plants Gone Wild: AFTER -You can actually see into my backyard from the front of the house now.  If you look at the BEFORE photo above, you couldn't even see the gate opening.  Wow.

Continue to Plants Gone Wild Part 2

Alzheimer's? I've Done Crazy Stuff All My Life

Priceless quote to remember:  

My mother this morning as we were having tea and coffee were discussing something she forgot.  Joking I questioned her if she was getting Alzheimer's or something.  Her reply: "I won't know if I'll ever get Alzheimer's or dementia because I've done crazy stuff all my life." 

Rub Salt Into Open Wounds - At Least When it Comes to Poison Ivy

You know the saying "don't rub salt into open wounds"... well that is exactly the answer to quickly drying up open poison ivy blisters. I've heard home remedy stories of opening the blisters and rubbing bleach on it, to swimming in the ocean, soaking in an Epsom salt solution, to swimming a pool for a while. The common factor in all? Chlorine. So I got the idea of making a salt paste which has chlorine in it of course. Started rubbing it into my open blisters about 2 hours ago (hurt like hell) and reapplying 3 to 5 times. Now my blisters have all but stopped oozing. Crazy stuff!

You just knew you wanted to see it... here is my arm, packed with salt. It actually looks pretty good in this pic believe it or not.  The poison ivy is mostly covered with the salt or it would be pretty nasty.